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The Week So Far before/after
Lowlights and Double-Takes:
Played at the park bar last night. Lots of fun to get back up on-stage again. Great crowd. College kids, mostly. Lots cute girls there, too. One meyowed at me after her friend made a comment about some of my qualities. Two girls sat in the front row and talked about me. It was fun.
I seem to have lost the ability to flirt and pick up women. I think I burned that out on my last acid trip, or the battering that my self-esteem took from the hypercritical, introspective trip has me feeling like a beaten child. Not sure which. Not too concerned.
I left the bar with my brother's keys. He stowed his guitar under his car while he waited for my return. It was stolen after he returned to the bar to wait. I feel somewhat bad, but only so bad. I do not feel I deserve credit for said missing guitar. I mean, that's just a bone-headed thing to do.
Perhaps this is some bizzarre spiritual karma. Awhile back, I felt like I was out of touch spiritually in many different senses of the word, and decided to open myself up to whatever. Shortly after that, I noticed weird things, which just may be all me. Like going into the basement and thinking I see someone hurry away, so certain, in fact I got goosebumps and that pissed off adrenaline rush to go beat some ass, only to find...no one. Hearing noises upstairs, only its just me.
Now I've dug up some of the information of ---------* , and I think he may still be around, sorta'. Got into a sort of an argument with him while I was tripping. I felt his prescence, like I feel others when I'm at peace, relaxed, with little to distract me. The feeling, to me, is a lot like when you try to push polar opposite magnets together. You don't see what's there, but you know it. And he felt angry, guilty and confused. I tried in a few hushed sentences to convince him that, yes, what happened was his fault, yes it was a horrible thing, and yes he's dead. I also tried to reassure him that I would do my best to take care of his friends, and that his wife had remarried, and that everything was to be fine, and that he needed to accept the fact that he was no longer alive, and shouldn't be hanging around. For some reason, i felt a sort of anger and challenge coming from him. He WANTS something, but I have no idea what, other than to take care of his friends.
But maybe that's all just me. I look at the world with child-like eyes at times. Sometimes I believe things until they are disproven.
And Tues. night, Don and I went to several bars. At one, I made conversation with the pretty bartender, telling jokes, and getting a fond look g'bye as I left, only to find out that she had been sucking face with her boyfriend five minutes before I chatted her up a bit. i guess i didn't notice he and his two friends standing behind me while I chatted up his girlfriend, playing video games and grumbling about me, unknowingly chatting up his girl, and she feeding into it.
Like I said to Don,"Hey, I guess that's why I work out. I'm not a roaming asshole, but I feel I can say and do whatever the hell i want." Its a good feeling.
Really, if you are gonna' be a jealous asshole, don't be a puss, too.
At one local bar (bar where all the "locals" go) called the candle light, I demanded "beaches of the world: bikini expose" be put on after the game. They complied, whereupon a David Hasslehoff advert came on, for some lame assed movie, striking a rambunctious chord in me.
me:"Hasslehoff!! Fuckin' Hasslehoff!! No shit. HASSLEHOFF!!"
(looking around, seeking a flicker of recognition, finding none)
me:"You know, Knight Rider!? The car, Kitt?! DAVID HASSLEHOFF, YEAH!"
Not one soul stirred.
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