Have I broken into the 10,000 club?

Its hard to say.

The past few years, say since age twenty four, I have kept a steady once a day pace.  Have trouble sleeping otherwise.

True, there are days I miss, and some days I exceed (Sunday is such a lay around and have sex day), but I am comfortable with such an esitmate.

With some rounding, as I turned 27 in July,  that comes out 1,095 times.

Now I did have a long term relationsip from roughly age twenty to age twenty three or so, and she did satisfy.  My numbers there are precariously low, remarkably so, as the most masturbation I did was involving her in some fashion, so I will not count those.

From age 18-20 I flashed in and out.  I did have a monkish period, of sorts, if the monk in question was allowed to drink heavily and abuse psychadelics, but abstain from sex.  I was hurt and wanted nothing to do with sex,  or thoughts of sex including masturbation.

However, there were times.  Particularly Sundays when all hope of masturbatorial abstinence was lost.  Three or four times a day was not out of sight.  Please remember that I was a late bloomer, and as such, the testosterone raging through me was phenomenal.  I grew about three inches or so and put on thirty pounds my freshman year of college.

And there was that period where I would abstain until Sunday, and beat the sheets like there was no tomorrow.  A lazy day of food and masturbation, if you will.

One may laugh.  Its okay.  Consider this:  aside from Lydia, the past couple of girls to grace my bed left me with a strong desire to masturbate even then, only stopped by the fact that they were in the bed with me, and quite inhibited.  They definitely felt threatened, as most girls seems to feel, muttering,  "I'm right heeereeee."  Well, if you were hotter, or better in bed, I wouldn't have to do this.  If you can't handle the load, don't take the ride.  Its not my fault you suck.

So its tough nail down an estimate, but given the skittish nature of it all, I'd be comfortable with an estimate of five times a week.

This leaves us with an estimated grand total of 1,875 times in my twenties.  Rather low, I think.  But taken the long term relationship into consideration, the number could have been quite higher, by about a thousand.  She satiated me, however.  Good girl.

Now comes the age grouping of 14-18.  Wow.

There is no explaining this.  There is no analogy.

No addiction compares.  Nothing.  It was like oxygen.

(and I still had wet dreams.  I was a cum factory.)

I started masturbating roughly at exactly the same time my body started producing sperm.

There was a one week period before that, which was bliss, I could masturbate without any sort of compulsory mess.

Then it started.  Just a little bit.  I called it "clearing out the prototype".

And I felt like a freak.  It took no time to come to orgasm, and it was nothing to hit it seven times in fifteen minutes.  Maybe less, I only watched the clock once.

It would swoop out of nowhere and pluck me like a teradactyl hunting for food.

I could be in the yard, and it would hit me like a ton of bricks, and I would dive into the toolshed.  Garden shed, whatever.

And we were all masturbatorial freaks at the time, terrified of being found out and subjected to horrible mockerey.

I still thought I was a freak until about age eighteen, when I confessed to my best friend how horrible I had been with the stuff, and he corroborated a similar experience with puberty.

I'd say easily three or four times a day.  I tried to resist, but simply could not.  It was my crack, my zealous religion, my lifesblood.

(It was so bad...I'd lay there with full thoughts of NOT masturbating, and it was like a wave would crash over me.  Like I blinked, and already had pulled it four times.)

So this may be a low projection, but twenty times a week sounds about right.  I was so relieved when the tide of puberty finally broke.

This leaves me with a low-ball estimate of 6,035 times.  So I'm likely not in the 10,000 club.

Oh well.  I can dream.

I now have to go to a job interveiw.