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the Fourteenth before/after
I have no idea what to make of 14th.
The 14th is my mother's birthday.
I typically call my folks every Sunday, and talk to them both a bit.
So yeah, I have to call mom on Valentine's Day. Sign me up for therapy. Nothing but bad news.
The relationship has changed between us subtly over the years. We're better friends now, than when I was a reckless teenager.
And now, as I come into my prime, Dad's health fails.
My father was diagnosed with MS shortly before I left home. Like within two weeks, after I had made the moves and changes neccessary to relocate.
It has progressed rapidly. He still looks the same, but if you watch, you can tell. When the heat is on thick, he limps and staggers. I think it has affected his mind, as well. His focus and a little recall has been diminished.
In some people, the disease progresses very slowly, but in his case, well, Dad never did do anything half-assed.
Now, after much prodding and poking by me and the rest of the family, he is aggressively seeking treatment. He went to the U-of-M medical center, which, as research hospitals go, is one of the best.
The doctor he has, five months ago secured FDA approval for his brand of MS treatment. He ran the clinical trials of a chemotherapy treatmen for MS.
Its a two year course of medication, given in three month intervals. It has many bad side effects.
The man I knew as a boy is disappearing. It may be a degenerative nightmare.
Although it may be awhile, the time that I will carry my father is looming closer.
I believe the only time in this son's life that he will be allowed the priveledge and honor to do so, will be as a pallbearer.
We've come to terms, he and I, and over the past few, have mended fences, and gotten to know each other a little better.
It just fuckin' sucks.
On the lighter side, I simply called Shelia for Valentine's Day, and she was thrilled.
Best outcome for me, really. It would have been muddlesome, and a mistake to go over for some Valentine's Nookie.
And I get credit for being a thoughtful, nice guy.
None of my roomates did anything more than call for Valentine's.
Girls should call guys bullshit on that score. Get flowers or a card or something out of the deal.
So many are thrilled by just a phonecall.
Aristotle was right. Women should take over the world by abstaining from sex. Three days, max, and it would all be settled.
collorary: On the flipside, the girl that truly knows fellatio, and has the aggressive nature to use it effectively and manipulatively, can dominate her surroundings.
Shelia and I had a decent phonecall. It was mostly just me running my mouth, and her laughing at me, but I did get her to riff once.
I've been asking people all day dead pan blunt: "So, how's your VD?" (Valentine's Day, just another in a long line of petty amusements. Right up there with the 'showing the 17 year old intern my meat-(products)'.
Phonecall slowed down at the end, though.
shelia:"So when do I get to see you again?"
me(sensing a trap):"Well...(pause)...when do you want to see me?"
Shelia:"How about tomorrow night? We can go do something."
Me:"(extended pause)...tomorrow night...(very long pause)...I don't know."
Shelia(flirtatious)"Well, you just call me when you know you want to go out, okay?"
Me:"Okay. Yeah. I can do that."
*Whew.*
Of course, she gave the wrong answer to the first question, the right answer being something along the lines of,"How about now?" or "Now. I want to see you now. " or "Now. Come over. Get that cute ass over here now."
Confidence is key. Even if she's faking confidence, I'd still come over.
*sigh*
I will never find the Right Girl.
I feel I am a decent, good guy to be a boyfriend, and I will die alone, 'cause I can't even find the right girl for a torrid six-month fling. I'm not even contemplating anything bigger. Cool if it lasts longer, but Je-sus.
One girlfriend told me, early on in our relationship, with a twinkle and a far-away look in her eye,"I'm only renting you, I'll never be able to keep you. You belong to the world."
Which is a sort -of wonderful thing to say.
She should have well said,"You are a freak of nature, and you will die alone, among strangers and the smell of rye bread." (I don't like rye bread)
Which may be more accurate, really.
So I have that going for me.
Wish me luck.
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