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Fiction: A Novel Idea before/after
Short Fiction: A Novel Idea
What we need is an April Fool's day tradition that means something.
Now I don't want to cause any trouble. The idea is one for the elecotrate.
My name is Dr. Samuel R. Kelly. I am an ethno-botanist.
And it occurs to me that the government, that despised necessity that it is, has no longer become resposive to the common man. He has become disempowered, and removed from the process, after all, only twenty percent of the overall population elected our last president, and this is something that needs to be rectified.
In what way can the common man make his voice heard, you ask? Well, I'll tell you.
In some far flung tribes in Africa, there will come a day when the Cheif gets his. He may be a good solid hardworking man, but the sum total of his decisions may leave some of the tribe feeling disaffected, disenfranchised and generally sour with the decisions he has made in the past year.
As such, the tribesman will tie him to a post, and beat him with inch thick sticks, and make him parade through the village naked. And in such a manner, the Cheif is effectively told who is in charge.
Now, in this manner, the common American voter can make his voice heard.
I suggest the Constitution be amended to include a parade on April Fool's day where the President of the United States must parade through Washington on foot, with the barest detail of SS agents in tow.
And while on this circuitous route which will take him through the sleaziest of slums and boroughs, any passer-by and parade watcher may avail himself to the most immediate display of their approval or lack thereof. Guns, knives and big sticks being the preferred disposition.
And now, in the same manner, the President may have spontaneous defenders, those people in the electorate who certainly approve of the job he's done, and as such are willing to lay it on the line, wouldn't that be interesting, I thought so.
Now as this contest evolves, we may end up electing virile, fleet young men to the office, who are scared shitless of pissing too many people off. This is the plan.
Huge clashes will erupt, and the President's leadership ability will be invoked, rallying the crowd to his side to defend against the onslought of the people. The Daughters of the American Revolution will riot. The Benevolent Order of the Elks will leap into the fray. The bloodshed will be enormous.
And in the end, should the President survive, he will be thrilled at the prospects of another year of life, and hold tenderly the affections of the people, such as they are.
Should the masses catch him, and dismember his body, well then his corpse will lie in state in the Capitol building for a year, as a reminder to the Congress that the people of this country don't fuck around, his job to be assumed by the VP and the line of succession is followed.
In this way, the Government will be made responsive to the will and needs of the people.
This is my novel idea, and I am Dr. Samuel R. Kelly, ethno-botanist.
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