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Apparently My Father Is A Poor Misguided Soul before/after My mother is a Valentine's birthday. And about every other year, my father whiffs on the present selection. This year, father got mother some irises and a twelve foot ladder. A twelve foot ladder. 'Oh, man, are you in trouble.' I thought. I tried to help. "The good thing about mom's birthday," I said, "Is that you've always got a second chance." Intimating that another gift was possible. "Oh, the irises are the valentine's day gift," he said offhandedly. In true form, it took mother awhile to get her head of steam together, and blow her top. "You poor, misguided soul," she said, "A ladder? A fucking ladder? Shove it up your ass sideways." I had to laugh. "Well, it wasn't the best idea," Dad persisted, "But I didn't think it was the worst." "So just go for the mediocre idea," she sputtered, "Good job." They've been going out since they were freshman in high school. One would think things like this got ironed out twenty years ago.
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