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Brush With The Weird
2003-01-25 - 2:14 p.m.


before/after
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Knew it was gonna' be a strange day when I saw the paranoid schizophrenic downtown lurch into traffic searching for my eye.  Lurching not with a suicide bravery sort of feel, but a lack of awareness groove.

I went to a local bar for my lunch.  No worries, no surprises, except for that schizophrenic, which has to be life's way of saying, "no matter what you do, weirdness will come and find you."

He was well haired, and bundled up.  Whenever I've seen them, wherever they are, they are always dressed warmly.  Who wraps these people up and sends them out? 

Probably their mothers.

Either that, or I have to come to grips with the fact that certain common sense just eludes many, making an oxymoron of the term.  Oftentimes, men and women will freeze their asses off in the name of fashion, but the paranoid schizo's can fall into a snow bank and wallow in a fit of shattered glee.

I avoided his eye as he crossed the street in front of me, carrying a half full bottle of coca cola, of which I got the impression that he found, for some reason.  I spot the insane easily these days, and schizo's stick out of the crowd, eyes swimming in confusion and jagged pieces of personality.  Their eyes search and always find mine.  Like a moth to a burning church, they are drawn to me.  As such, I avoid their eye, as much as I want to look, I know its just the best way. 

So I went to the bar, looked at the menu, gave up and ordered a cheesburger and french fry.  I looked around and listened to the ciggarette smoke and whiskey voices of a couple of bar flies.  Behind me sat a police officer and his significant other.

The door jangled and opened behind them.  I looked up into the mirror behind the bar, but I knew from the timing that it had to be him.  The schizo.

He sat down promptly at the table with the cop and his girl.  A hush fell over the bar.

"I can see by the way you are sitting, you cannot see the Khmer Rouge with your peripheral vision."  the schizo said.

"Um, no, I can't,"  said the cop.

"They're quick and silent.  Just like ninja's."  the schizo said, and got up and left.

There was a pause as the door slammed shut, and everyone just sat.

The cop turned to his girl and said, "Was that an old boyfriend of yours?"

 


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