I was fiddling around with one of the rough cuts from this weekend's gig that I made while I'm learning how to use my recording software, and I made a really nice cut.  Its been playing in my head, over and over and over again, and I love it.

I don't know how long the love affair will last, if it will go on past the discovery stage, finding all the blemishes and finding it ultimately wanting.

But I love it right now, like I love all my bastard children of creation.

In other news, I felt frequently today like I was simply sitting in my head, riding around in my body, watching it go.  Which is fine, except it doesn't help the studying so much.  I wanted to take off work and work on the music, but that's not really an option.

In more news, which isn't even tangenital...hmmm, lets look at that one, shall we?  Tan-GENITAL.  Genital. 

Hello, ever present libido.  What the fuck's up with you?

Anyway...fuck, tan-genital...fucking tan-genital.  "Dude, I was sitting on the beach, and I can home with one TAN GENITAL."  (Like you had one piece of the troika lounging about outside the shorts.)

I sat in class today, while the guys talked and I did labs.  Or tried to do labs.  I ended up just soaking in my surroundings, like i do from time to time and drifting off to another part of mind.  I swear I must've been a plant in another life.  (But that's TAN-genital)

And they talked about nothing, like people usually do.  Its almost comforting, in a way.  Its like, you can safely NOT pay attention, because really, usually, you won't miss anything.

They were talking about inspecting houses, or buying houses, and the shitty houses they were looking at on the other side of town.  And I heard this gutteral clicking noise.

I imagined a raptor on the loose, prowling about the lab, ready to pounce.

AND THERE IT WAS!  LARGE!  Six foot if it was in inch.

It pouced and grabbed one by the head in its jagged teeth, biting his head off in a bloody spray!

"...yeah, the houses on that side of town...they're...rough."

Then the raptor grabbed my lab partner!  It gouged his eye out with a sharp toenail!  With savvy, I hid behind a stack of routers, keeping the stack between me and him.  Unlike the others, I was prepared for this sort of thing...

And I sighed.  Why doesn't that sort of thing happen in real life?  This shit that I'm studying...I can do, and there's a call for, meaning I can make very, very good money doing it.  However, its like eating a bland peice of food.  Sometimes you just go...bleah.

Wouldn't you want a man who was prepared for the raptor on your side?  On your team?  Can I put that on my resume?  Raptor-awareness?  Skills:  prepared for eventual duel to the death with a deadly velociraptor.  Isn't this important anymore?

Who gives a shit about all this technology crap?

But really, tan-GENITALLY, what I was originally talking about was the ride to work, listening to my music.  MY music.  (suddenly, I'm possesive of it)

I drive past this large clutch of scottish pine trees by the highway.  Its stands out because its the only one.  They are contained by a fence.  Or are they?

Below on the ground is another clutch of seedlings and yearlings and so on.  The fence could not contain them.  Didn't even come close.  In that place where the pine cones lay in cluttered positions, covering the ground, the ecosystem found a way to triumph.  And there the clutch calls to its brood, its other self, mingling roots below the fence.  Life always finds a way. 

I like that very much.

tan-GENITALLY.