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Mocked By Twelve-Year-Olds before/after A side note story that I forgot to add: The day of the hike, we stopped at a small pizza shop for sandwiches to take on the trail. Audrey went off to use the bathroom, while I sat alone in the dining room, waiting for our order to be completed. There was a tv set there, on ESPN, which was showing the World Championship Series of Collegiate Softball. Whatever. I sat and watched as two young, sexless preteen girls came in, sat down, and got some sodas. They talked quickly amongst each other in rapid fire speech apparently about weighty issues. Or so it seemed, anyway. The guy in charge of the shop came out and saw that the World Championship Series of Collegiate Softball was on television and looked at me awry. "Dude, you can change the station. Its right on the bar. Below the tv." he said, like I'd made some sort of mistake. "Okay." I said, and got up to change the station. I didnt really care so much about what I watched, but I did want to fit in. Dont want to be chased with torches and pitchforks by the local folk. "Are you guys watching this?" I asked the girls. "No." they answered in stereo. "You can watch whatever you want," one said dismissevly. "Dont you like softball?" I asked. "No." they answered in unison again. I pointed at their blue sweatshirts, that had athletic scribings on them. "Then what do you play?" I asked. "Basketball," they both answered at the same time. Pause. "Are you any good at it?" One piped up authoritatively, like I was a dumbass or something. "AAU championship game." she said, pointing at her blue hooded sweatshirt. Apparently, that was what the writing meant, and somehow I was an asshole for not recognizing the connection between blue hoodies and a girls junior high basketball championship game. I flipped through some channels. I stopped on C-SPAN, where some lengthly, dull Congressional debate was on. "How about C-SPAN?" I asked, deadpan, "You girls like C-SPAN?" "No." they answered at the same time. "You can...you know, watch whatever you want." the one piped up again. And I turned my back to change channels again, when I hear from the other one behind me. Like she made her eyes wide and indicated me. "WEIRD." Mocked by twelve year old girls. Just when I think things can't get any lower for me. I left the tv blathering on some pointless, non-controversial channel and sat down. Audrey got out of the bathroom and sat down beside me. Hurriedly, I told her the story. "But...its okay," she said, "You ARE weird." Its the story of my life.
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