I stumbled out of bed, saw that it was five, and went to the bathroom.  The cat trotted amiably at my side, thrilled that the day's 'action' had started.

I micturated into the toilet bowl, but unfortunately it came out like window-washer fluid.  One stream went into the bowl, the other went off to the right somewhere.  I thought I hit the cat, but I wasnt sure.  I've pissed on the cat in the past, and he usually runs away, well, pissed off.

Still, no response from the feline.  He jumped up on the back of the tank in his usual manner, to get stroked like nothing was wrong.  I reached over to stroke him and I felt an awful wetness.

Fuck.  I DID piss on the cat.  Again.

He sniffed it quick and looked at me as if to say, "What's the problem, pal?  Its YOUR piss!"

Fucker got me back. 

Revenge is a bitch.