I love america, but it never ceases to annoy me.
Every year, on the White House lawn, prior to Thanksgiving Day, the President issues the turkey a pardon. I'm sure this wasn't always the case, and maybe even with a bit of bemusement back in the day the help used to look on with a jaundiced eye and think, 'yep, Buddy Boy, pick up that axe and put your soft ass to WORK.'.
But instead of hacking the turkey's head off in this day and age, the President grants the turkey a pardon. Its a quaint little nice nelly-ism.
Except this time we sent the turkey to Disneyland after he got his pardon.
Its gotta be insulting if you hear this news while living in a destitute country. Or even for our own poor living among us, it has to be demoralizing.
Its like, we're so rich...we even send our food on vacation.
It doesn't make sense.
Sure, the turkey was under a lot of stress, and maybe needs a break. But he got his pardon, he'll live out his days fucking his turkey brain out and die a wisened old bird, telling tales and raising little toms to believe in hope. Which is a cruel thing when you're a domesticated turkey, hope.
What I find exceedingly annoying about it is not necessarily that we sent our food on vacation while people starve and scrape to get by through life. No, what really annoys me, on top of all of that, is that we sent our food on vacation to do human things. There is no way that turkey enjoyed his time at Disneyland. He was probably scared shitless the whole time.
Imagine for once that the turkeys have finally taken over. You are taken to their leader and you're about to be sacrificed in a ritual of appreciation for their life and consumed whole and utterly. The small turkey children will play games shattering your bones. Then you get a repreive. You will be sent to a farm to fuck your brains out and eat to your heart's content for the remainder of your days. Its a gorgeous fate, in a way, if you don't mind watching 99.999 percent of the rest of your species get raised and consumed like a product. Generations will rise and fall, and you will watch from the safety of your speical environ, created for you especially for you, and maybe a few others like you. Comfortable with your favorite chair, and bed. The finest clothes and foods. Sexual partners like you would never have dreamed of will be yours. The proverbial plethora of virgins at your disposal.
But first...you've got to go to a turkey farm and scratch your nose in turkey shit and turkey feed for a week while everyone tells you how great it is. Make sure you get your nose right in there. You don't know what you're missin'!
Its just so annoying. Still, that is a price for perceived freedom, putting up with every crackpot and idiot around you.
